For more than a year brave Lisa Magill courageously documented her battle against terminal stomach cancer.
The Brisbane woman started a heartfelt blog – Terminally Fabulous – in order to share her cancer journey with humour, honesty and passion.
But in March, after a four-year fight, she passed away aged just 34.
Lisa’s brave voice had touched so many hearts, it was a tragedy that moved the world.
Now, nine months on from her untimely death, Lisa’s mother Geraldine has written to Lisa’s 63,000 Facebook followers via her page to tell poignantly of her mourning – and how she hopes Lisa’s legacy will live on.
In October, Geraldine – who has been working with support group LifeCircle in a bid to help others – wrote an open letter to grief, explaining how it had managed to ‘knock my family off our feet’.
‘Every day I drive home from work with the sorest pain in my heart, have I moved on too quickly, am I forgetting my beautiful girl by moving on with my life?’ Geraldine wrote in an emotional post.
‘You put these terrible thoughts in my head when all I’m trying to do is get through each day.
‘You paid all the family your usual visit on the 11th of the month. We were in work when you snuck up behind us and took us all to that dark place, the place that causes us all so much pain,’ she continued.
‘It’s like we are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. If we try to keep going, you follow us and if we stop at all, you are there, messing with our heads and hurting our hearts as much as you can. You just aren’t happy until you see us our knees.’
Geraldine went on to say that Lisa’s niece Ava had channeled her own grief into creating a beautiful card for her aunt which she ‘put outside in the front garden for the birds to deliver to heaven’.
‘I’m sure you didn’t expect this, she’s far bigger than you grief, her strength puts you back in your place. Hopefully we all learn from her in time,’ Geraldine wrote.
‘I remember when Lisa was suffering so bad, I just kept telling myself that this was as bad as it would get, our pain could never ever get any worse, then we were introduced to you and your nasty games.
‘There are days we can fight back, we put one foot in front of the other and we focus on what’s important but you’re not content with that, you aren’t happy until you see the tears flow, and our pain come pouring out. I wouldn’t mind if you picked on me and left my family alone, but no, you attack us all.
‘One day we will be strong enough to cope with you, I don’t know when and I definitely don’t know how but the day will come when we can look back and feel nothing but love and appreciation at our precious memories,’ Geraldine went on.
‘And as much as I know you’ll always be lurking in the background, you’ll start to realise that we are bigger and stronger than you and we are determined to keep our Angel in our hearts with love and pride…… not pain.’
The devastated mother concluded by reaching out to others who are in mourning.
‘To everyone that is battling grief, you are not on your own,’ she wrote.
‘We will get each other through this as we have our beautiful Angels by our sides and carrying us through when we most need it. Please reach out anytime you need a chat.’
Geraldine knows Christmas is a difficult time for those struggling with feelings of grief and wants others to know they are not alone.
If you are struggling to cope, help is available from LifeCircle – a support group that encourages open discussion about dying – or if you are in need of crisis support contact Lifeline on 13 11 14.
